vs

he says

develop a routine

over and over and over and over and you can hear the sound of that phrase like the water that pounds the shorelines to sand

so you scrape together the bits and pieces and scraps and tatters of your attention and time and resources and sanity and

against every odd no sane bookie would ever agree to

you create the island you were commanded to create: And it works

you want to dance on its beaches and make forts in its trees and nap in the cool safe caves

And he washes chaos over your safe harbor, every inch

destroyed by his insistent assertion that thisĀ routine

does not apply to him

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what they see

my friends all seem to think

i’m doing something right, something that’s a coherent direction

done by design, and i

am just flailing and sometimes getting lucky

Balance Scales

when it takes thirty years to articulate

what I want

because what I want

has never been important to anyone. Not even Not especially Not me

Because I had the idea that taking care of others meant others would take care of me

People don’t give back because you give People give back when you demand, when

you expect no less, when

you don’t give a damn about how they feel, when

you don’t even care enough to try